


Letters From The Past

by Purplechimera



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, F/M, First War with Voldemort, Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-16
Updated: 2020-09-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:48:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26075179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Purplechimera/pseuds/Purplechimera
Summary: Teddy finds letters from the First Wizarding War in his father's attic.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 14
Kudos: 48
Collections: Wolfstar Hurt Fest





	Letters From The Past

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to all the Hurt Fest Mods for putting this together!! Such a fun fest (albeit very sad)

On Teddy’s seventeenth birthday, he officially inherited his father’s estate. Unofficially, Harry had been taking him on regular visits his entire life. Still, there was something special about unlocking the door with his own key and not having to wait for Harry to get off work. Teddy wandered around touching objects at random, not having to worry about Harry or Grandma Andy suddenly fighting back tears. 

He ascended the attic stairs for the first time, smiling to himself at how neat it was- just like his father’s office. These two spaces seemed to be the only ones his mother hadn’t taken over. Along one wall were boxes labeled with each year at Hogwarts, and Teddy marveled for a moment at how similar the handwriting looked to his own Hogwarts boxes. After most of an hour, Teddy came across an unlabeled box that had been shoved in the corner, underneath a stack of hideous, itchy blankets. The photograph just inside revealed both the era and the reason for the box’s lack of labeling: James and Lily Potter were grinning maniacally in front of their home in Godric’s Hollow, and James kept patting Lily’s swollen belly. Along with a few other bits of memorabilia from the First War were stacks of letters.

~~

2 Aug 80

Moony,

I know people have a habit of not keeping you updated- and of course mostly it isn’t safe- nothing is, I suppose, especially these days. But I had to write you! We have a boy!! He already has his dad’s hair. I’m fine, I can hear you asking. I would love to hear from you, but don’t stress about it. I know it’s hard enough to receive mail, let alone send it. Stay safe!

Lily

~

1 Sept 80

Moons-

The Prongslet is  _ too much _ . He even pulls on my hair like his dad! Hopefully he got some of his mum’s brains or we are all doomed. She tells me he’s not old enough for a broom but the earlier the better, right? We can just attach his little bouncy chair to the seat! I don’t know why Lily got so upset when I suggested it. It’s not like we couldn’t add a cushioning charm. I hope you were safe last week, I wish I could have been there to help. At least being out in the wild would mean fewer self-inflicted injuries?

I hope Dumbles lets you come back soon, I miss you. Stay safe.

All my love, 

Pads

~

9 Sept 80

Moony,

Is there anything more terrifying than a baby? Sometimes I look at him and I am filled with pride-sometimes I look at him and all I can think of is all the crazy shit we did in school and  _ how in the world is he going to survive?? _ Do you think our parents worried about us this much? Mine never showed it if they did...Do you think my dad got up to shenanigans at Hogwarts like we did? Will my son carry on our legacy?

Lily has just asked why I had been staring in horror at my quill for several minutes, so I suppose that is enough existential crisis for one day. I hope you are staying safe-Dumbledore said you should be back next month.

Prongs

~

25 Sept 80

Moony,

I have been to see Prongs and the baby. Not sure I understand all the fuss, but everyone is excited and I guess he is kind of cute. Finally I’m not the shortest! Prongs said Padfoot had been by earlier in the month, but I haven’t actually seen or heard from him since June. Don’t you think it’s weird that he’s missing so many Order meetings when he was the first one to sign up? Hope your hunt is going well. I thought about you last night.

Wormtail

~

8 Oct 80

Moooooony,

You should have been here, Prongs and I got chased on Elvendork by Muggle Aurors and nearly got blown up by Death Eaters (we got away. Obviously). I knew it would be a good idea to enchant her to fly. It was totally worth it, launching into the air when those Muggles thought they’d cornered us in an alley. Of course Prongs had to ruin my fun and point out after that even with the fighting we are still not supposed to violate the Statute of Secrecy. He’s still putting on the “responsibility” act, as though graduating means we suddenly have to be boring and serious. Though I suppose he does have a baby now, so he’s got to be somewhat responsible. Still, running from Muggles felt almost like old times again, back when we had to hide from professors after curfew. Only missing you and Wormy-and that extra bit of James that helped us evade even the most observant persecutors. I’ve just been interrupted because apparently we are having  _ another _ meeting.

Adieu, mon coeur

Pads

~

14 Oct 80

Benjy found Mary McDonald. He could hardly tell us where she was, between vomiting. I know she’s not the first person they’ve killed but...she was the first of us. 

Prongs

~

04 Nov 80

Moony,

As you probably know, Pads had another birthday. He wasn’t nearly as excited as normal. I’m sure you remember how he made us celebrate him even more than usual, when we were in school. It’s almost like he didn’t want people to notice him at all. Some of the girls made him a cake, and we even managed to acquire a couple bottles of firewhisky. He drank a lot, like he usually does, but instead of getting loud, he just got quieter and quieter until he went to bed. At least, I’d thought he went to bed. But when I went looking for him this morning, he was coming down off the roof, looking like he’d been out there all night. Do you think something is going on?

Wormy

~

12 Nov 80

Moony,

I hope you’re staying safe. Dumbledore said he’s going to bring you home for Christmas, but the killing has ramped up again and I’m scared he will back out on it again. I know what you’re doing is important to the war effort but none of the rest of us are isolated like you are-at least we have each other to lean on. What did he promise you? A future? That’s useless if you burn out before the future gets here.

Sorry this is so melancholy-I sat down to bring you some happiness. The baby is growing well, and he has been smiling at Pads more than anyone. We tell him about Uncle Moony, don’t you worry. He’s going to love you. He’s such a happy baby, which is a blessing we desperately need right now. I wish we all could be as happy and carefree. 

I miss you terribly.

Lily

~

01 Dec 80

MOONS

I can’t wait to see you, hanging out with Wormy is dreadful without you. Prongs still comes on missions sometimes but babies sure take up a lot of space for things that are so small. The baby and the war are all he talks about these days. I guess the war is most of what anyone talks about these days, but...I guess I thought there would be more to being an adult. Fletcher said at the last meeting that you’d be here the week before Christmas-not exactly Happy Christmas to me, but I suppose as close as we’re going to get. Do you think you’ll be here on the 21st? I’d love to run with you again. Maybe we can even get Prongs out of the house.

See you soon!

Pads

~

22 Dec 80

Where are you? Dumbledore refuses to share information on the grounds of secrecy, but at least he finally said that you’re alive, or were, yesterday. So I hope you’ve made it through this moon, though I’m starting to give up hope that I’ll see you for Christmas. Maybe for the new year? I know you’re busy, but if you can, please write back.

Love,

Pads

~

22 Dec 80

Moony,

Are you safe? Or, at least, as safe as you can be? Dumbledore continues to refuse to give us any information, though Sirius finally threw a fit and Dumbledore reluctantly said he’d spoken to you yesterday. So, at least you’re alive then. None of us have heard from you. I know things are crazy, doing what you’re doing. But any kind of signal would put our hearts at ease. Wish you could have been home for Christmas.

Stay warm.

Love,

Lily

Moons- I know what you’re doing is important. But family is important too. Come home soon. -Prongs

~

11 Jan 81

Moony,

Never have I looked on the new year with such bleakness. We’re not even two weeks in and we’ve lost Benjy  _ and _ Caradoc. Dumbledore says Benjy was reckless, but...I would have been too, if I’d found you like that. At least he took out a bunch of DEs with him. I never liked funerals, on account of how many stick-in-the-arse relatives showed up, but I’ve almost gotten nostalgic for them. At least I didn’t care who was being buried, then. At least there was always a body.

I’m almost out of firewhisky.

Pads

~

15 Jan 81

Having a baby is fucking weird, Moony. They’re loud and demanding and interrupt your sleep. If you or Pads or Wormy did this to me, I would have charmed your nose hairs to glow pink. I’m so fucking tired all the time, but then he smiles at me and I don’t care that this is the fourth shirt I’ve had on today because he’s spit up on every other one. Pads brings him a toy nearly every time he comes to visit, Lily has threatened him more than once about it. But you know Pads, he does what he wants, consequences be damned. Lily’s transfigured some of the stuffed animals into a mobile-with one for each of us. He’ll lay under that thing for like, twenty whole minutes! (That’s a long time for a baby. This is the part where you act impressed.) Yesterday Pads showed up with a sidecar on his motorbike, but Lily finally put her foot down. I thought she was a bit harsh about it, but also...she kind of had a point. I mean, he can’t even sit up by himself yet, and his favorite activity is shoving as many tiny fingers as he can inside my nose. Still, I think Pads is stepping into his role as godfather quite well, considering, well, Pads.

Hope you’re safe.

Prongs

~

13 April 81

Is it warm, wherever you are? We’ve had a bit of a warm snap, but the owls are all acting like it will turn cold again. I thought winter would slow down the DEs but if anything, they’re moving around more now. Maybe they don’t know how to light a fireplace. Remember when we used to carry fire in jars so we could stay warm? And then Wormy’s fell out of his pocket and got smashed by the Whomping Willow. I thought Hagrid was going to murder us. I guess it’s lucky that living wood doesn’t burn so easily, eh? I hope you’ve got a jar with you, Moons.

Pads

~

21 April 81

Moony,

Do you think this will ever be over? Or are we just going to keep running and hiding and sparring forever? Sometimes I think it would be easier just to give up. I wish you were here to answer my questions, you’re so much better at it than Pads. And more patient. Prongs is all preoccupied with the baby. I don’t get how someone who can’t even talk can take up so much time. But he’s always brushing me off, saying that he can’t come over, he’s got to get home to relieve Lily. Relieve her of what, exactly? Staring at a stinky, wriggly blob?

Wormtail

~

06 May 81

Mate, 9-month-old babies are the  _ best _ . He can sit up by himself, but he can’t really move around yet, so we just charmed his toys to stay within a circle around him, and he’s happy to stay there all afternoon. He is still shoving everything into his mouth (Lily says he’s teething) which means everything is wet  _ all the time _ . Which is a long way of saying I’ve gotten very adept at drying spells, which fourth-year-me would never believe was possible. Arthur said he got some notes from you, so I hope you are safe. It was nice to get confirmation of your life from a source other than Dumbledore. 

Stay well,

Prongs

~

17 Jun 81

At this point I feel like I’m keeping a diary, rather than writing to another person. Do you know how hard it is to write to someone who never writes back? I know it’s not your fault but...it’s hard. Not having anything to respond to, not knowing whether you’ll even be alive by the time this reaches you...at this point it feels like I’m keeping a journal of deaths. Someone died today, gotta go write Moony. If he’s still alive.

Stay alive, okay?

Pads

~

30 Jul 81

Moony,

The Longbottoms came by, and we threw a little party for the boys. I hope they continue to get along as well as they do now, it’s so cute to see them playing together. Maybe one day they’ll go on adventures together, just like us! On second thought, perhaps I don’t really want them to do that. Somehow Frank managed to get some ice cream. Alice said they’d had it for ages under a charm, but I’ve always suspected that Florean had some kind of secret way into his shop. He never would admit that to me, though. Maybe he only tells family. Anyway, it was a wonderful treat. You would have loved it, even if it wasn’t chocolate. You probably won’t hear from us for a while, but I promise we are extra safe. I’ve instructed Pads to write you twice as often, since we won’t be able to.

Write when you can!

Prongs

~

15 Aug 81

I promised Prongs I’d write you, so here I am. I got the Prongslet a tiny broom for his birthday. Lily scolded me, but I could tell she was pleased. The death toll keeps climbing. Dumbledore’s promises sound more and more hollow. 

Pads

~~

Crumpled in the bottom of the trunk was a ragged piece of parchment. Teddy carefully smoothed it out on his knee. Even through the ink blots and quill holes, he recognized his father’s handwriting.

~~

~~ Dear ~~

~~ Padfoot ~~

~~ Sirius ~~

For some godforsaken reason I feel obligated to write you even though you don’t deserve it. You don’t deserve anything. I don’t understand, I’ll probably never understand. After everything James did for you….after helping you and pulling you out of the grasp of the Blacks, your true colors finally showed through-you are one of them. Your mother would be proud.


End file.
